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Forum > Nhật k tiếng Anh >> the famous bridge i knew

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 Post by: zeroman
 member
 ID 15475
 Date: 06/26/2007


the famous bridge i knew
profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang    edit -sua doi, thay doi  post reply - goy y kien
my countryside is pleace in west of Viet Nam , but i'm living in HCM city for my education and career

sometime or holiday i usual to comback my countryside to see my parents and my village , from HCM to my village it take about eight hours sitting on the car .passed many bridge the bigest is my thuan bridge , from far looking it's very high majesty you known it's importance bridge of west connect two sides of tien river . before had my thuan bridge it take about hours to pass tien river now only twenty minutes specially after had this bridge , west of viet Nam more development


mnh đang practic writing . cc bạn xem , chỉ dm mnh chổ sai nha
cảm ơn nhiều


gp kiến
 Reply: thoithanhtan
 member
 REF: 93828
 Date: 06/26/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
My hometown is in western Vietnam. Now I am living in HoChiMinh city because of my education and my career. On the vacations or public holidays,I usually return my native to visit my parents and my village. It takes about eight hours on the car to go my village from hochiminh . On the way,I go through many bridges .The biggest one is My Thuan Bridge. When we see it at a distance, it seems to be a rainbow ,looks majestic. When come near the bridge, we appreciate it is really a famous construction.
With the financial favor of Australia Government, My Thuan bridge is the first chain-bridge in VietNam. It was buit to connect two regions of Tien River .In the past, it took hours to go through this river by ship or ferry-boat.As having this bridge ,the transportation becomes much easy.Futhermore,it distributes the important condition of the economic development of western VietNam.

I base on the ideas in your post and rewrite it.I'm sure that it still has many mistakes.I hope you will correct them so that we can learn from each other.Thanks.,I have not ever gone to west of VietNam.Would you take me to visit your hometown?


 
 Reply: zeroman
 member
 REF: 93870
 Date: 06/26/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
thanks thoithanhtan very much

hope you will support me after post

if can i will invite you go to my hometown for holiday
my hometown isn't touring place . but it had many beauty-spot i thought so my house is in seaside font of house is seaward . we can setting before the house looking far in the sea relax drinking some beer earting seafood talking any thing from important thing to funny thing
after holiday you will felt easiness (thoải mi) get power to back your work

how do you think my invite ?
pls reply me soon


 
 Reply: violet
 member
 REF: 93880
 Date: 06/27/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
Hi Thoithanhtan and rezoman

I read your post. My hometown is in western Vietnam. I am glad to read this post.
Best Regards

Vi


 
 Reply: yenaomi
 member
 REF: 93883
 Date: 06/27/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
hello everyone! Can i join the trip with you? I like traveling very much! Hope u will agree. Thank you very much!

 
 Reply: namthao
 member
 REF: 93892
 Date: 06/27/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
Hi Zeroman,
Ti rất thch cch bạn viết, tuy nhin ti xin ni trước đy l publish do đ mỗi người mỗi , tuỳ bạn judge yourself.
Thứ nhứt, bạn đ biết cch dng "but" để connecting 2 sentences. kế đến l your ideas was very clear. ti xin analysing: đầu sentence bạn cần phải viết capital "M"; bỏ chữ "Pleace"; mnh thch bạn dng the west of Viet Nam better than western Viet Nam. Why????
West of Viet Nam: phần pha ty của nước Viet Nam.
Western Viet Nam: (pha) ty Việt Nam khng phải l phần của Việt Nam.
Th dụ: North Korea and South Korea, hoặc trước kia người ta thường ni: North Viet Nam or South Viet Nam hoặc West Germany or East Germany. one country but seperated.

by giờ: East of Germany and West of Germany; North of Viet Nam and South of Viet Nam. one country, But not seperated.

Do đ phần mở đầu mnh c thể sữa cho bạn như sau (not much). When writing should use formal writing althought it is not thing wrong with unformal.

My countryside is in the west of Viet Nam , but I am living in HCM city for my education and career.
Bạn dng "for" ở đy perfect.

I usually come back my countryside to see my parents and village on (during) holidays and my spare time.
bạn đ dng "my" parents, bạn khng cần dng "my" cho village nữa.

It takes about eight hours sitting on the car from HCM city to my Village.
Discuss about tense. Bạn đ dng "usually come back" c nghĩa l bạn đ về qu v trong tương lai bạn sẻ về qu nữa, do đ ti chỉ dng present tense ở đy.

Completed rewriting:

My countryside is in the west of Viet Nam , but I am living in HCM city for my education and career.
On the way home, I pass on many bridges, and the bigest bridge is My Thuận that looks very high majesty with a far view. As you know the My Thuận bridge is important bridge of the West, which connects two sides of Tien river. Before having My Thuan bridge, it took about hours for passing river, but now it takes about about twenty minutes. The West of Viet Nam is development more.
Chc bạn thnh đạt.
Nam Thao


 
 Reply: zeroman
 member
 REF: 93908
 Date: 06/27/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
thanks bạn namthao rất nhiều

mnh mới tập viết được 1 tuần nn sai cn nhiều
được bạn chỉ dẫn mnh rất biết ơn v c thm động lực để tập viết nhiều hơn


 
 Reply: namthao
 member
 REF: 93921
 Date: 06/28/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
Hi Zeroman,

Thật sự ti rất thch những người lun c đầu c hướng về pha trước như bạn. Trong tiếng anh, học hnh c nhiều bậc. Khng nhiều, t nhứt bạn cũng biết nối hai mệnh đề với nhau th đ giỏi hơn người chỉ biết viết từng sentence một. tuy nhin ti khuyn bạn.

- Double or more checkings again sau khi bạn viết xong.

- dấu chấm v dấu phết phải c cho những nơi cần thiết trong khi viết. Ngy xưa khi ti học, nếu ti dng tense khng đng ti bị trừ một diễm. dng dấu chấm v dấu phẫy khng đng bị trừ 1/2 điễm. dng article khng đng bị trừ 1/4 điễm. tứ cu văn khng r rng, mỗi chữ trừ một điễm.
Chc bạn vui vẽ

Nam Thao



 
 Reply: cuteteen
 member
 REF: 93923
 Date: 06/28/2007


  profile - trang ca nhan  posts - bai da dang  edit - sua bai, thay doi   post reply - goy y kien, dang bai
h, teen mới thi xong n, chấm điểm cũng kinh khủng lắm, bắt từng chữ 1 lun....1 chọi 10 lận, gh lem'....hixhix
miss namthao much....T_T


 
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